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MICRO REVIEWS (via Twitter!):  GET HIM TO THE GREEK, BITCH SLAP, THE CALAMARI WRESTLER, TALES FROM THE SCRIPT, Uwe Boll’s RAMPAGE…

MICRO REVIEWS (via Twitter!): GET HIM TO THE GREEK, BITCH SLAP, THE CALAMARI WRESTLER, TALES FROM THE SCRIPT, Uwe Boll’s RAMPAGE…

Posted on June 21st, 2010

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Coop’s most recent MICRO REVIEWS (via Twitter):

Got some high-rated exploitation (and one documentary) this time around! All of these movies are terrific, especially Uwe Boll’s surprisingly powerful RAMPAGE (who would have expected that one?)…

RAMPAGE: Uwe Boll knocks one out of the park. Hyperviolent domestic terrorist shocker delivers. Hell freezes over. 4 out of 5

BITCH SLAP: Fun, hyper violent, tongue-in-cheek exploitation about 3 sex bombs killing each other over loot. 3&1/2 out of 5

THE CALAMARI WRESTLER: Japanese wrestler dies and reincarnates in a mansized rubber squid suit. New camp classic. 4 out of 5

TALES FROM THE SCRIPT: A little bitter, but a must-see doc for anyone even remotely interested in screenwriting. 4 out of 5

GET HIM TO THE GREEK: Russell Brand = comedic genius. Best drug freak out scene of all time. Can’t stop giggling. 4 out of 5

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Why SPLICE is Overrated by DARK SIDE…

Why SPLICE is Overrated by DARK SIDE…

Posted on June 10th, 2010

I was perfectly willing to let this one go until I read the imminent Stacy Ponder’s negative review of Splice down over at the Final Girl blog. She expressed her reasons for disliking the film stem from the fact that if you take the sci-fi element of the film, you basically have a Lifetime Channel rehash of The Hand that Rocks the Cradle.

Thanks for pointing that one out, Stacy. I admit I somehow missed that one, but now that I look back, you’re 100% right and it’s obviously another subconscious reason why I hate (that which I merely disliked beforehand) Splice. I have several other reasons why the flick failed to iron my britches and I feel the intense urge to list them all below…






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MICRO REVIEWS (via Twitter!): SPLICE, EXAM, D.E.B.S., DISCTRICT B13: ULTIMATUM, VALHALLA RISING…

MICRO REVIEWS (via Twitter!): SPLICE, EXAM, D.E.B.S., DISCTRICT B13: ULTIMATUM, VALHALLA RISING…

Posted on June 7th, 2010

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Coop’s most recent MICRO REVIEWS (via Twitter):

SPLICE: Frankenstein redo with icky scruples, laughably repulsive monster and jerk hipster protagonists. Uncool. 2 out of 5.

EXAM: 8 job hopefuls locked in a room with ticking clock and menacing set of rules. Cool concept, sloppy plot. 3 out of 5.

D.E.B.S.: Lesbian evil mastermind seduces crack agent of an all-girl superspy team. Spoof undermines message. 1 out of 5.

DISTRICT B13: ULTIMATUM… Cliche, low on action. Huge insult to the original which set action standards. 2 out of 5.

VALHALLA RISING: A bloody, trippy, grimy, violent, slow and pretentious allegory for the death of religion. 2 out of 5.






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