It’s an oddity of a film. Originally titled Dark Angel(???), this film capitalized on the late 80’s/early 90’s B-movie star power of Dolph Lundgren. Imitating a Shane Black, cop-buddy movie like Lethal Weapon or The Last Boy Scout, the film adds an additional element to the mix… a 9-foot tall alien drug dealer.
Detective Jack Caine (Lundgren) is a huge cop with a hilariously undersized gun. His undercover partner just got iced by a ridiculous group of yuppie crime lords called the “White Boys.” Before he can exact some karate justice, a mysterious stranger appears, wipes out a whole room full of White Boys with some sort of funky, heat-seeking razor-disk and takes their millions in heroin. The peculiar nature of the murders draws the attention of the Feds who assign (force) Caine to partner up with the tiny/arrogant Special Agent Smith (Brian Benben). As the wackily mismatched pair start to determine that the perp might not be from our solar system, an alien cop arrives to single-handedly take down his criminal counterpart. Oh, I forgot to mention… The alien dealer’s goal isn’t the heroin. He uses the heroin to O.D. humans and then harvest their natural endorphins so he can sell them on his homeworld of Shazbot. His method of extraction is both cool and disgusting. Did I mention he has rayguns that blow things up real good?
This movie has everything:
- Crazy weapons
- Lots of explosions
- Giant actors fighting
- An alien cop (played by ESPN college basketball analyst Jay Bilas!) in desperate need of “Hairclub for Men”
- 1 homely/hairy girlfriend who is nowhere near Dolph’s league (I cringe when he kisses her)
- Benben spazzing out like Poindexter when he sees an alien hiding in the back seat of Caine’s car
- Mathias Hues as the evil alien! He’s like 12 ft. tall, built like a pro wrestler and is apparently a certified genius and a successful entrepenure in real life (just like Lundgren). Isn’t life fair?
- An awesomely hilarious cameo by Michael J. Pollard as “Boner” the informer
- An evil alien who can only speak one English phrase: “I come in peace!”
- A redonkulous (and kick ass) action movie that’s well paced and Hollywood 80’s style
- It takes place in… Houston, TX?
- I think something’s wrong with your ball, Boner.
- Don’t be foolish! Tell the White Boys to kiss my ass!
- Did I see it??? It almost blew my f’n face off, man!
- I’m kinda used to following proceedure, you know?… Right now I think we should just kick some ass.
- Woman: Who is that guy? Dolph: Some a–hole from outer space.
- F-you, spaceman!
- I come in peace!
- And you go in pieces, a–hole!
This lost gem is hard to find on VHS, much less DVD (it ain’t on Netflix, man), but I’ve found an easy way to watch it online.
First see the trailer…
Now the movie on YouTube in blurry VHS quality. It’s better if you find it on DVD, but why wait?… Well, I would but this is the only way I can find the film at the moment…
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