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ARMORED trailer…  Fishburne, Dillion, Reno, Ventimiglia, Ulrich, Ward, Short:  Interesting cast!  by COOP

ARMORED trailer… Fishburne, Dillion, Reno, Ventimiglia, Ulrich, Ward, Short: Interesting cast! by COOP

Posted on April 16th, 2009

I like heist films when they’re done right and that’s uncommon. I loved “The Italian Job” but that’s the last one I remember digging at all (Does “Reservoir Dogs” count?). Yes, I’m counting all of the “Ocean’s 11” movies. No, I didn’t like them. Most are usually smug (“Oceans”), uncharismatic (“Entrapment”) or try to be […]

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“Bard None:  A Cinematic Guide to Really Bad Shakespeare” by JAY

“Bard None: A Cinematic Guide to Really Bad Shakespeare” by JAY

Posted on April 16th, 2009

Terrence Howard is Macbeth. That’s not a typo. The “Hustle and Flow” star recently announced plans to not only bring the seminal Shakespearean tragedy to the big screen but to set it in the Caribbean confines of Puerto Rico and cast himself in the title role. No start date has as yet been set for “Macbeth, Mon” but I’ll wager it’ll be a favorite of the Sundance set come 2010. Oh, and Eddie Murphy has decided to reinvent the wheel by taking “Romeo and Juliet” and shifting the focus of the story to Mom and Pop Montague and Capulet; thereby turning the treasured tale of unrequited love into “Meeteth the Fockers”…

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RED DAWN remake!  Someone has seen the script!  by COOP

RED DAWN remake! Someone has seen the script! by COOP

Posted on April 15th, 2009

No, that someone isn’t me… But, from what I’m hearing so far, I’m not too eager to read the thing. As you might’ve guessed, this time the Chinese invade. This isn’t so fun because it turns the whole thing into a war against races as well as countries (as you might remember, the cast of protagonists in the original “Red Dawn” were all pretty much all white).

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OBSERVE AND REPORT (2009) **** movie review by COOP

OBSERVE AND REPORT (2009) **** movie review by COOP

Posted on April 15th, 2009

It seems these days that Seth Rogen can do no wrong. He has top lined nearly every major comedy release in the past few years and shows no indication of slowing down. Everybody knows he’s a funny actor, but a great actor?… “Observe and Report” may prove Rogen had more ability than anyone imagined. The sad fact is that general audiences might not recognize the depth of Rogen’s performance as Ronnie Barnhardt and many won’t get what the film was trying to accomplish.

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BLINDNESS (2009) * DVD Review by SEBASTIAN

BLINDNESS (2009) * DVD Review by SEBASTIAN

Posted on April 14th, 2009

I usually like allegory. Maybe I would like the source material that “Blindness” adapted from, but the film itself falls flat on its face. It is a nasty, illogical piece of cinema. It also manages to insult, not just its audience, but the entire community of the blind as well. The story imagines what might […]

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PRIDE AND GLORY (2008) ** DVD Review by SEBASTIAN

PRIDE AND GLORY (2008) ** DVD Review by SEBASTIAN

Posted on April 13th, 2009

Once again Edward Norton pulls out another amazing performance in “Pride and Glory”, another police drama attempting to emulate the classic style of Sydney Lumet. The film follows a NYC police family that becomes involved in corruption that soon threatens to tear apart lifelong bonds. Ray Tierney (Edward Norton) is persuaded by his high-ranking father […]

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MOON trailer is freaking me out!  by COOP

MOON trailer is freaking me out! by COOP

Posted on April 12th, 2009

Here’s what you need to know: It stars Sam Rockwell as a guy alone on a moon base without a soul on the rock to talk to except for his trusty, super-intelligent computer voiced by Kevin Spacey. He’s lost communication with Earth, but his 3 year tour is almost up and he’s preparing to go […]

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Stephen King’s UNDER THE DOME.  Is he ripping off other people’s ideas now?  by DARK SIDE

Stephen King’s UNDER THE DOME. Is he ripping off other people’s ideas now? by DARK SIDE

Posted on April 11th, 2009

Stevie King has a new book coming out.  Since 90% of his books are turned into films and miniseries and whatnot, I figured this was relevant.  This one’s called Under the Domeand the official synopsis for it sounds a bit… familiar: On an entirely normal, beautiful fall day in Chester’s Mills, Maine, the town is […]

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MIKE JUDGE, creator of OFFICE SPACE, has a trailer out for his new film: EXTRACT…  by COOP (P.S. Jason Bateman stars!)

MIKE JUDGE, creator of OFFICE SPACE, has a trailer out for his new film: EXTRACT… by COOP (P.S. Jason Bateman stars!)

Posted on April 10th, 2009

Did I forget to mention that he also created “Idiocracy” and “Beavis and Butthead” (like you didn’t already know)? Can’t tell what this one is about exactly but apparently Jason Bateman plays a factory manager with lots of problems at home and work. Co-stars Ben Affleck, Mila Kunis, Kristen Wigg, Clifton Collins Jr., J.K. Simmons, […]

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Not a Xenu’s chance in hell…  Travolta + Cruise does NOT = BUTCH CASSIDY & THE SUNDANCE KID!!!  by JAY

Not a Xenu’s chance in hell… Travolta + Cruise does NOT = BUTCH CASSIDY & THE SUNDANCE KID!!! by JAY

Posted on April 9th, 2009

(NOTE: Jay is a master of observational sarcasm and a welcome new contributor to The Small Town Critic. Behold his wit and satire in this news item that rightfully scores a solid 10 on the ludicrous scale)… So Tom Cruise is teaming up with BFF and fellow Scientologist John Travolta to remake the Newman / Redford […]

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10 TOUGHEST MOVIE HEROES OF ALL TIME by COOP

10 TOUGHEST MOVIE HEROES OF ALL TIME by COOP

Posted on April 8th, 2009

These are the heroes that just won’t go down no matter what you thow at them. The best of the best. The Greatest. Here’s the criteria I used while making the list… a. The heroes must survive to the end of their film/franchise. b. No superheroes with superpowers. c. Pick heroes who represent cult phenom films. These are my results:

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ADVENTURELAND (2009) ***1/2 movie review by COOP

ADVENTURELAND (2009) ***1/2 movie review by COOP

Posted on April 7th, 2009

Remember the summer job that you once hated, but in retrospect count it as one of the best times of your life? That’s what “Adventureland” is going for. As I watched it, I recalled a scene from “American Beauty” where Kevin Spacey’s character Lester laments his days as a teenager, flipping burgers and chasing girls; […]

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Who Sandy Collora is and why you should care…  by COOP

Who Sandy Collora is and why you should care… by COOP

Posted on April 7th, 2009

If you haven’t heard of “Batman: Dead End,” you’ve missed out on something. A few years ago (before “Batman Begins”) this Sandy Collora guy got a camera and a few people together and made this… Pretty damn impressive, no? The guy’s made a career of creating creatures, designing, storyboarding and whatnot. Looks like he’s got […]

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KNOWING (2009) ***** movie review by SEBASTIAN

KNOWING (2009) ***** movie review by SEBASTIAN

Posted on April 5th, 2009

I know I’m biased here, but I loved Alex Proyas’ heartfelt apocalyptic love-letter of a film, “Knowing”. Most filmmakers would be content to present the masses with cardboard cutout characters and action spectacles in a movie like this, but not Proyas. The film begins with the premise that fifty years ago a time-capsule was buried […]

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À L’INTÉRIEUR (“INSIDE” 2007) ***** …  a retrospect.  YOU ARE NOT PREPARED!!!  by DARK SIDE

À L’INTÉRIEUR (“INSIDE” 2007) ***** … a retrospect. YOU ARE NOT PREPARED!!! by DARK SIDE

Posted on April 5th, 2009

Haven’t seen this one in about a year, but no matter what you’ve seen… YOU CANNOT HANDLE THIS HORROR MOVIE. It’s horrific in the extreme as only the (recent) French can accomplish. I’ve seen nothing like it and I don’t expect to see a competitor soon… Unless this “Martyrs” movie is as slick as they […]

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Jackie Earle Haley IS Freddy Krueger!!! It is written…  by DARK SIDE

Jackie Earle Haley IS Freddy Krueger!!! It is written… by DARK SIDE

Posted on April 4th, 2009

Tarzan’s Magic 8-Ball sez… “Outlook Good.” Word coming down from my H’wood sources says Jackie Earle Haley’s a lock as Freddy Krueger in the “A Nightmare on Elm Street” remake. He scared me and thrilled the world as Rorschach in “Watchmen” so why not. The guy needs a slam-dunk commercial break in order to make […]

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SWIMMING POOL (2003) and UNDER THE SAND (2002) DVD foreign film musings by SEBASTIAN

SWIMMING POOL (2003) and UNDER THE SAND (2002) DVD foreign film musings by SEBASTIAN

Posted on April 3rd, 2009

“Swimming Pool” and “Under the Sand” were both helmed by the same director: Francois Ozon. There are subtle tones and themes that run through both films. He hits all the right notes that a filmmaker should when making a compelling drama. He finds, in both films, an extremely capable actress in Charlotte Rampling. As studies […]

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A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (remake) concept teaser-trailer thingy?  by DARK SIDE **UPDATE**

A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (remake) concept teaser-trailer thingy? by DARK SIDE **UPDATE**

Posted on April 3rd, 2009

What the deuce? It’s not anything to get excited over, but apparently this is a concept teaser-trailer designed to get studio execs on board with the new “Elm Street” remake concept that Christopher Johnson IV is pitching. Here’s part of the info included on the Youtube page where the trailer appears… This is NOT produced […]

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WATCHMEN: TALES OF THE BLACK FREIGHTER/UNDER THE HOOD (2009) ***1/2 DVD review by COOP

WATCHMEN: TALES OF THE BLACK FREIGHTER/UNDER THE HOOD (2009) ***1/2 DVD review by COOP

Posted on April 2nd, 2009

Did this “complete my ‘Watchmen’ experience” like the commercial said it would? No, it didn’t. It’s told out of context, making it extremely difficult to find the relevancy to the feature “Watchmen” (my review here) film, even for the discerning fan. In fact, anyone not familiar with the graphic novel who picks this up simply […]

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LAUNCH!!!   Welcome to the new site… by Coop

LAUNCH!!! Welcome to the new site… by Coop

Posted on April 2nd, 2009

Dig the new digs. Not bad, eh? It’s STILL a work in progress, but as far as you are concerned, it’s ready to roll. Browse around the menu. You can… Read all of my articles and reviews Read about me and meet my contributors Sign up to follow me on popular social networking sites See […]

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