THE DARK SIDE CRITIC sez: “STOPS COPIES ME!”

You’re gonna have to forgive the self-indulgent post here, but this has been cracking me up all day.

My love for “Metalocalypse” is no big secret but sometimes when an episode strikes me as hilarious, I can’t stop laughing for days.

Take the episode “Dethcarraldo,” in which the band, Dethklok, hears about a drug called “yopo” that can only be found in the Amazon rain forest. The band decides to go down to South America to find the cannibal tribe of headhunters that make the yopo so they can try it. Before they go, they stop off an an outfitters to stock up on camping supplies.

The exchange happens between guitarists Skwisgaar Skwigelf and Toki Wartooth as they tell the outfitter clerk what camping supplies they need. Now Skwisgaard and Toki are from Scandinavia. Their English ain’t so good and neither have any clear grip on reality. Plus Toki seems to be having a “copying” problem like he’s 5 years old.

Here’s a transcript of the scene…

Swkisgaar (to the clerk): Gives to me this waterproofs guitars and drums and makes sure it can floats!

Toki (to the clerk): Gives to me waterproof guitar what shoots out bug repelskant!

Swkisgaar: Gives to me magic gloves what can makes my hands fly!

Toki: Ooo! Gives to me opposite werewolves that turns into humans when the moons comes out!

Swkisgaar: Gives to me the sword that glows that shows me which way that is north!

Toki: Ooo! Gives to me battle axe that shows me which way is south!

Swkisgaar (to Toki): Stops copies me.

Toki: (to Skwisgaar): YOU stops copies me.

Swisgaar: Stops copies me!

Toki: Stops copies me!

TOGETHER: Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me!…

And so on.

Now maybe this is one of those situations where you “just gotta be there.” So, here’s a YouTube audio clip of the episode. The exchange happens at 1:47…

It’s makes me giggle. So sue me.

#%$@! you, I’m going to Clown College!

-The Dark Side Critic